Wanna see my monkey?

I'm going to take a little break from talking about Caboose, and talk about my husband a bit... since that seems to be the trendy thing to do these days.

The folks that know me know that I can be a very... passionate, yeah, that word will do, person. By this I mean that I'm Irish/German, so when I tend to get stressed or frustrated at what I perceive as an illogical situation, I get grumpy. Really grumpy. And living with a zen master really hasn't helped to zen out my temper moments much at all. In fact, it tends to make me more angry because he sits there and looks at me like a kid throwing a tantrum, then gives me the, "woman, are you finished?" eyebrow raise. Caboose even gives me this look, which makes me want to punt the dog... and no good can come of that. People that punt dogs are generally locked up and a key thrown away, so we can't have that.

So when I get really angry, I tend to explode. That's when Hamilton pats me on the head, gives me a hug, soaks up the grumpiness like a sponge and puts it away in the sink or wherever zen masters put negative energy. What helps is that, in order to make me feel better in situations where I'm at my lowest, Hamilton has taken to developing a monkey persona. Not only does it make me laugh, but it helps him show emotion, even if it's in a joking way. Nothing makes me laugh like the angry monkey, no matter how grumpy I am. Many times, it's made my own inner angry monkey go away, which makes us both feel better. Only my bear would do things like this just to see me smile, so I feel obligated to share pictures of "monkey" with the world. They're just that good.

So, without further ado... here is my monkey:

Happy monkey - This is a good thing to see. Usually happy monkey comes out when he's done something good like take out the trash, opened a pickle jar, killed a spider, or received a kiss.


Bad monkey - This is the monkey that's just done something wrong... and knows it. The yelling is coming, please momma, don't hurt monkey. Occasionally includes an eye twich for "don't beat me" emphasis.


Sad monkey - Monkey is unhappy. Maybe monkey wants a sammich. Maybe monkey wants a hug. Maybe monkey was just bad and got a paddlin'! More often than naught, this face usually follows the bad monkey face.


Angry monkey - He has rabies and he's not going to take this abuse. Last seen on an episode of mammals gone bad, he's out for blood. Look out, it's ANGRY MONKEY, and he may fling poo!! (Doesn't he look like mojo jojo from the powerpuff girls? How can you not laugh?)


So that's my special little man, and his 4 faces. I know I'm missing at least 2, but I haven't gotten a good picture yet. As more appear, I'll show the 2 people that read this blog so that you can share in the giggles given that I have now become a regular little blogger. We'll see how long it lasts. :)

I should have known he didn't want to cuddle.

As mentioned before, Caboose and I have a love hate relationship. This means that I want to love him while he is plotting to kill me or, atleast, drive me crazy. That's why when he started cuddling up with me this morning, I should have known better.

Before I get into what happened today, I need to explain something about Caboose. Corgis, as a breed, are known for having a propensity to being... how shall I say, rounder than the average dog. Most corgis need to have a very closely monitored diet lest they get to the point where they can't walk, but are still crawling towards a nugget of deliciousness. Needless to say, I thought I could identify with a dog like that as I suspect the same thing would happen if you left me locked in a mashed potato factory over night. Unfortunately, Caboose is not that kind of corgi. Instead he has this ritual he goes through every night that I'm convinced he does so that we don't check him into an anorexic corgi unit. What he does is this: at about 8pm he'll go in his room and rustle around a little. About a minute later he'll walk out, ears down and drop 3 nuggets of food on the ground in the living room by the tv. Then he looks at me, as if to say, "look momma, I'm eating. Really!" before eating each nugget, one at a time. He'll do this about 2 more times before he finally stays in his room and eats whatever he's going to eat for the day... which is never the full bowl we left him.

As a result, I try my best to make him fat like the rest of us, so when I make crock pot chicken I will usually mix in some chicken broth or chicken bits with his food to entice him. It's cheaper than buying that gravy you can mix with a dog's food, it's probably better for him and he seems to like it too. So last night was no exception. I made the chicken, pulled it apart, and put the misc bits and some broth in a bowl for Caboose. As I walked over to his bowl his little nubbin was a'waggin', he was very happy and he even seemed to be smiling at me. For the first night in awhile he ate his whole bowl of food and seemed pretty content.

When I woke up this morning, he followed me around then snuggled up with me on the couch. I assumed this good behavior was a thank you for the deliciousness from last night. I watched The Closer and pet him for an episode when I noticed that he was breathing a little fast. His tummy started gurgling next, and finally he whined a little bit at me. I knew this was it. Caboose doesn't whine. He'll maroff, he'll bark, but Caboose does not whine. Something was not right. Like the nurse from Madeline I grabbed Caboose and made a b-line for the backyard. This was not going to be pretty. I had just managed to basically toss him into the yard when the poor thing erupted. Apparently his little body was not at all pleased with all the eating that was threatening his model-like figure, and the look on his face made it quite clear that he was not pleased with me as well. If he could speak, I think he would be yelling something like, "You did this to me, woman.. and you will pay!"

I felt bad about the whole thing so when we came back in I grabbed a few milk bones for him as a peace offering. One was vegetable, one was peanut butter and one was chicken flavored. He ate the green one and the brown one, but when it came to the light brown one he dropped it on the floor and went over to his sulking spot next to the coffee table. I grabbed another green one and the light brown one and went back over to him. Surely he's just full, he can't be boycotting the chicken. Well, sure enough, he gulped down the green one again and sniffed at the chicken flavored one before maroffing and laying his head back down. Apparently, he's had quite enough chicken, thank you very much.

All and all, he seems to be feeling better now and is resting beside me again in his usual arms length away position. His indifference helps me to know that everything is okay. Although, every now and then he looks up, and gives me a look. I swear that behind the corgi grin, he's plotting my demise.

Poonuggets

If you hang around us long enough you'd probably hear us reference things by what sounds like something scatological and the genesis of it all happens to come from Caboose, literally. In our backyard there is a sectioned off patch with two oak trees and this vine undergrowth with small thorns. There much to our amazement we discovered some berries that looked remarkably like raspberries. Naturally we didn't eat them, but admittedly it was kinda neat since the rest of our backyard tethered somewhere between death and near death and to find something so colorful and alive made everything else that much better. That was until we found out that Caboose chose that particular patch of the yard to do his business, and thus those raspberries became Pooberries. Pooberries involved into Poonuggets as a way to describe an unfavorable situation, simply because of how well Caboose does his business. And then finally Poo in how we address one another, partly because of the first words in the wife's wow character and secondly it sounds like Pooh, as in Poohbear. "Poo" however retains it's ambigious meaning though, cause I may very well be calling her Poohbear or a Poo.

Isn't love grand?

Caboose's morning ritual

There's a reason why I tell the wife not to let the dog sleep upstairs in the bedroom, it's not the actual fact that he's sleeping upstairs with us but something entirely different. Caboose has learned that my side of the bed is enemy territory and that he is invading the sovereign nation of Imasleepingherestien and will be met with that country's feared weapon, namely my leg.
So, Caboose sleeping upstairs isn't a problem, it's in the morning when dawn breaks across the horizon and the first rays of sunlight pour through our shuttered windows. What wakes me up isn't sound of birds celebrating the new day but a low guttural sound followed by what can only be described as a cross between a cough and a bark, which I call a moruff.

Why Caboose? Did the birdies offend you in some way? Were you traumatized as a young pup by birds? Or is it because they taunt you with their powers of flight when you chase after them? Cause unless you are suddenly able to climb trees those birdies could care less that you're trying to intimidate them. I on the other hand, wish you were closer so that I could show you the might of Imasleepingherstien. But instead I must issue U.N declarations of reprisals that fall on deaf ears and attempt to go back to sleep.

Pardon me, I don't think we've been properly introduced...

I find it wrong that the first major post to the blog is not referencing it's namesake. As I sit here on the couch playing online poker, I figured that was something worth correcting. World, Caboose. Caboose, world.



There we go, that feels so much better. :)

In short, Caboose is my nub-tailed nemesis. The longer version is that when we moved into our house, I felt it was time to get a dog. My husband (who watches too much anime and had never owned a dog) wanted a corgi. "The cyber corgi on this anime is really smart!" says he. "They'll herd our children," says he. "The queen of England has 4!" says he. So I said fine (he did do his homework about them after all), and then I ended up being the one to feed, train, play with, and, finally, want to kill the puppy. You could say that Caboose and I have a love/hate relationship. He is cute and thinks of me as his alpha, but he also destroys my garden, chews up my underwear and scratches at my walls. One of these days dog.... one of these days...



It's my hope, as Caboose's chew toy, to post up all the amusing stories of my Caboose as they happen. Unfortunately, this has not been the best of weeks, so I don't have much to say just yet. I think Caboose has noticed that I'm a little melancholy as he has not left my side all day. My husband calls my current mood "acting a little cauliflower", which I think fits as I swear Caboose is staring at me thinking "that chick's going down if I can get my paws on some ranch!"

In all seriousness though, on one hand, it's nice to be loved. On the other hand, he's seriously invading my space as he sleeps spread eagle on his back and snores. In fact, his face is, right now, resting on my left hand as I type this on my laptop on the couch. It makes it difficult to type, but, I have to admit, it kind of helps.



So, anyways, there's the introduction to Caboose. It's not much, but in time it'll get there. Stay tuned!

Why MMO's Fail

Not being one in the industry, but someone who enjoys the games as a whole, I find it remarkable that game companies continue to repeat the same mistakes over and over. At least in my mind they do. In the early days of MMO's it might have been acceptable to release a game that contained bugs, gameplay issues, and missing content. But the rules of the game changed when WoW hit the market. Was WoW particularly innovative? Bug free? Completely balanced? Not at first but there was a degree of polish that was placed into it that made it easy to overlook, combined with a live team that moved to address these issues folks came to WoW by the millions.

Game companies however see WoW's amazing success and want a their own stellar hit in order to hang their hat on, but continually make the same mistakes over and over.

• Know your competition - If you are designing a MMO, you need to be a fan and a player of the current MMO's out there. You can't be a good chef if you don't love food and appreciate the different flavors and combinations of other chefs and styles of cuisine. In that same vein, MMO designers who are designing for end game content but have never experienced that type of content let alone play MMO's should never be allowed to design in the first place. WoW is very quick to pick up good ideas in competitors games and implement them into current content, WoW that we know of when it first launched and the WoW of today are very different.
• Don't listen to marketing / Don't release early - Marketing will tell you that holiday season is when to launch, or based on market research your game needs to launch in such and such window. If the game isn't ready, it isn't ready. You have one month in order to impress the people who will buy your game and get them to talk about your game to their friends. Anyone who has ever worked in the service industry has watched the training video about the customer and how word of mouth can affect your bottom line. You simply can not ship a game that is unbalanced, buggy, unpolished, and missing standard MMO features. The set of features that are expected of MMO's has risen due to the popularity and years of work Blizzard has placed into WoW. Your potential customer base is more than likely to be either currently playing WoW or has played WoW and will like dating a new girl and comparing it to your ex, compare your game to the WoW.
• Don't lose your reputation - Blizzard has a very strong reputation behind them, the could probably release a game called "Blizzard Steals Money from Starving Children" and people would buy it simply because Blizzard developed the game. What can be said about your game company if your games are less than stellar comming out the door? Now any game you put out subsequently will still reek of the pile of crap you tried to sell us before.
  
• Get a good IP or make one - Movies like mmorpgs are a big investment and as you've seen recently by the influx of sequels to establish IPs, creating something that sticks to consumers is a big gamble. Thus the sequels. So as a game company you can either try and bet big by releasing a brand new IP or find something that will resonate with your audiences. You either decide to spend alot of marketing dollars to help push your new IP, buy an IP, or do something compeltely different and not make an mmorpg at all. Why not make an mmorpg if you don't have a good IP? Think of it as the first movie with a decent ending that sets itself up for a sequal. The Episode 4 to the Star Wars universe. Lower cost, faster turn around, and if you capture the public's attention you can continue the story through .. you guessed it an mmorpg.